Wednesday, April 11, 2012

A Day Without Quilts

I just want to say, to begin with, that the comments on my last post really meant the world to me.  I sat and thought about every one of them and really listened to your advice and support.  Thank you for your words.  It reminded me that I should comment more.  I read a lot of blogs quickly on my Kindle and don't comment but those small gestures can mean a lot to the person who wrote the post.

I think somebody tipped off my husband that he should read the post.  He called a family meeting and we had quite a talk about mutual support and taking mom for granted.  Then the talk took a surprising turn for me as it turned to what quilts meant for each of them.

At that point, the house was bare.  Without quilts around, it was cold and generic and really didn't even feel like our house.  The kids were looking around at the bare walls and the window seat where we keep a stack of quilts for watching television.  I hadn't taken the quilts off their beds, just all the ones in the common areas. 

I cried as they talked.

Drama Girl said when she brought friends over they always asked about the quilts and she was so proud to say her mom made all of them.

My husband talked about how he loved to watch them evolve on my design walls.

They each talked about how they loved them and different quilts reminded them of different times in their past and how they liked to watch the seasons change in the house by the different quilts I brought out.  I was really crying at this point.  I never imagined they felt that way.  They had never said anything.

Then Drama Girl made a confession.  By this point she had tears in her eyes too.  "Mom, that one quilt you made for my bed that's really soft?  The reason I always put it with the bottom towards my pillow is so I can keep the label on the back close by and read it."  On the label I had written how I will always love her.

Quilts are love.  I think they have learned their lesson now on how much it means to the quiltmaker to say thank you and I love you back.  And how even though quilts just show up from time to time, it's important to admire them and acknowledge the effort involved.  Most importantly, they realized that there has been a lot of support flowing in one direction around here, and some of it needs to flow back to mom.

So I'll put the quilts back out.  Here's a little bit of the new quilt as I was working on it.  My feelings are still a little raw but I will probably move forward on this one and pick up my hobby again.  Thank you for all of your kind words.  It's been a rough few days.

11 people stopped folding laundry to write:

Wendy said...

I am relieved. I only just read your last post, and I clicked to see if you'd posted again and was happy to read this post. I'm glad they're going to show you how they feel about your quilts from now on. Well done for making them sit up and take notice.

Joanna said...

I'm so glad that your family opened up and showed their appreciation! You make beautiful quilts, and I can't wait to see how this one turns out!

Melissa said...

I am so glad they got the message - I am all teary just reading it. I hope you find your zest again soon.

Rosemary said...

I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes after reading your last blog. I'm so glad your family not only realised they'd hurt you, but that they took quick action to try and fix what they'd done. I hope you get back to quilting soon and find the joy you previously had when making your wonderful quilts.

Handmade Redhead said...

I am so sorry I wasnt here to read your last post and comment on it. I cried while reading the second half. I still have tears in my eyes. I'd give you a huge hug if I could. I dont quilt, but I love looking at your quilts and I have always admired how you rotate them with the seasons. I want to see your best work ever! I hope you'll share it.

Hang in there. Sometimes families just need a little reminder that the mom is not all powerful and cant read minds. As mom's we know this, but husbands and kids dont know our superpowers do not go that far.

Goddess in Progress said...

I'm so glad to hear this came to a good resolution and got aired out in a really productive and positive way. And, of course, I'm extra happy that you got to hear exactly how much your quilts really DO mean to your family!

Pokey said...

I am late to chime in-okay, Pokey can mean slow-but I was touched at your sad events, and so blessed to see the story turn to the way it has! What a great thing your honey did, and the kids sharing that they have heart for you also.
Keep quilting, it's one outlet of creativity that brings joy to your life! Let's face it, I say I madly love my kids about every 3rd day...but there are those other 2 out of the three that I could wring their necks...just sayin. Thank you for the share, really, you are not alone.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I think that living with teenagers feels a lot like being a teenager again! Glad that your husband talked to them and you guys had a heart to heart. :)

Brown Dirt Cottage said...

Oh, I am soooo glad to see maybe you are feeling better. I think taking down the quilts was a great eye opener for the family. A great visual on their part to see life without the lovely quilts!!!

Oooooo, that little green project looks VERY interesting111

Cheryl said...

So happy to read this post...and what a great husband you have. A family meeting was just the thing to have everyone share their feelings ... PERFECT!!! I have some happy tears for you and glad your quilts are back out.

Karen said...

Sorry it took such an unpleasant time to have your family open up about their feelings. Hope you can find joy in quilting again.

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